Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Randomize