considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
