i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
