Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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