I want to walk on stilts...naked
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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