The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize
