i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Randomize
