You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
if only i could text you this smell
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Randomize
