Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
