just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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