Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Randomize
