he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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