if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
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