So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
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