He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
My breath smells like gin and sadness
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