Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
then he tried to convert me to islam
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Randomize
