He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
