jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
