So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Randomize
