Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
