I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
