At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
