I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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