The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
