He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
