dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Randomize