I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
