remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize
