So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
