Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Randomize
