Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize
