He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
And my parents said I crawled through the house
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
