just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Randomize
