wanna go halves on a baby?
I hope mine doesn't look like that
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
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