His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
