Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
You peed on a flamingo?!?
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
Randomize
