i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
