Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Randomize
