you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
