In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
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