they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Randomize
