wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
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