Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
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