how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
i've created a new STD.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Randomize
