Whod you bang
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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