But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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