he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize