At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Randomize
