Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Randomize
