i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
