the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Randomize