HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Randomize
